How to Analyze People - Andy Garner

 

How to Analyze People - Andy Garner

Chapter 1: What Can Human Behavior Tell Us?

*Out of all the brain activities, 5 % are conscious.

*Behaviors cannot be interpreted in isolation

The unified framework

3 major processes to understand human drive: Investment, Social influence, Justification

1) Investment = everything that goes into making the action to create the change you seek

2) Social Influence

It’s not normal for us to be driven to do things without influence from the surrounding society.

(Henriques) You must consider cooperation and competition regarding social influence.

how people rate us in terms of the amount of respect they deem us worthy of and how valuable they consider us to be.

Respect i.e. how well we’re doing by listening, showing up when we need them, and sacrificing things that matter to them for our sake

3) Justifications = reasons for (not) doing things - encompasses such matters as scientific claims, societal laws, and personal rationalizations

Chapter 2: The History of Human Behavior

Our actions are either reflexive responses to stimuli or driven by anticipated consequences, including rewards and punishments that influence future choices.

Pavlov

Classical conditioning: taking stimuli that used to be neutral and connecting them with other stimuli to cause the desired behavior

Edward Thorndike

Law of Effect (1905)

:we act the way we do because we want the best outcome for the circumstance in which we find ourselves.

John B. Watson

“Psychology as the Behaviorist Views” (1913)

“Behaviorism” grew out of his rejection of the psychoanalytic theory of Sigmund Freud

:In a controlled world, we can train healthy infants to become whoever he wanted regardless of the children’s ancestry, abilities, tendencies, talents, and anything else that might be considered a hindrance.

Burrhus Frederic Skinner (1904–1990)

:The “behavior” (action, speech) is repeated if the consequences are good.

:“Skinner box” - place a small creature in the box, and to be rewarded, the creature would have to work a lever or push a button

< has philosophical basis in George Santayana’s dictum: “Those who do not learn from history are doomed to repeat it.”

:“Principles of Psychology” (1924)

:“The Behavior of Organisms” (1938) -An operant is a class of responses made by an organism, the probable future responses of which are influenced by their consequences in such a way that these consequences become more and more likely.

Fred Keller

:roughly 80% of human behavior could be explained by the operation of “reinforcement schedules” (1938) which is described as “an actual mathematical principle.” [with Nat Schoenfeld]

:experiment- rats were trained to press one button to get food pellets

The “reinforcement schedule” was based on the ratio of the length of time the rat pressed before getting a pellet compared with the time long after it received a pellet.

Ray Birdwhistell

:established kinesics as a study in 1952 - studies body language, specifically how humans use gestures and posture to communicate with animals

:“Introduction to Kinesics” (1952)

-verbal aspects of our conversation are only responsible for about 30 to 35% of the messages we pass along to others

-the way we move our bodies comes down to culture and should not be considered universal

Chapter 3: Decoding Someone’s Verbal Behavior

Tone of Voice

“It’s not about what you said, but how you said it.”

Speed of Voice

:passion makes your words just seem to flow more quickly

:voice’s pace will likely turn into a rant if you start getting emotional

:slow down = think clearly and choose words carefully = perceived as wiser

Attitude

:can make it hard to correctly pass a message to others

Choice of Words

:show actual emotions and intentions

Tips for Decoding Verbal Behavior

1. People often talk to persuade others of a specific feeling or experience.

2. People often say things to convince themselves that what they’re feeling isn’t really as bad as it feels.

3. People often exaggerate when trying to convince others of something.

4. People often say things to avoid conflict or play victim.

5. People often say things to invoke laughter.

6. People sometimes say things to change a topic of conversation or redirect attention to something else.

7. People often say things to express anger rather than to try and resolve a dispute or problem.

8. People sometimes say things to fill the room’s silence.

Chapter 4: Picking Up on Non-Verbal Cues

Non-verbal communication is the delivery of unspoken messages through body language.

Amplitude and Frequency of Gestures

Hand placement | Eye contact | Body motion | Voice characteristics | Body motion | Space separation and appearance | Blinking frequency | Facial Expression | Breathing

Chapter 5: Understanding Different Personality

The Myers-Briggs 16 Personality Types

Extroversion (E)

I have many friends and different interests

I take action pretty fast

I speak before I think

I am usually the one that initiates conversations

I am sociable

I am more focused on the outside world

I get more energetic after socializing

Introversion (I)

I have a few deep friendships and refined interests

I take my time before taking action

I think before I speak

I wait for others to approach me to start a conversation

I am usually quite

I am more focused on my inner world

Spending time with people drains me, and I recharge when I am alone

How do you view the world?

Sensors (S)

I prefer doing things the traditional way

I am very observant

I am a doer

I enjoy practical things

I usually think in concrete terms

I am focused on the here and now

I pay attention to details

I am attuned to all my senses

Intuitive ( N )

I prefer doing things using new ideas

I am imaginative and creative

I am a dreamer

I enjoy theories

I usually think in abstract terms

I focus on the future and what could be

I am focused on the big picture

I follow my gut feeling (sixth sense)

What is your decision-making process?

Thinkers (T)

I take a more scientific approach

I am fair and treat everyone equally

I am interested in things and ideas

I use logic to make decisions

I use my head

Feelers (F)

I take a more poetic approach

I am compassionate and treat people based on their situation

I am more interested in people and emotions

My decisions are based on my values

I use my heart

What is your planning process?

Judgers (J)

I am eager to make a final decision

I prefer to be in control of my life

I stick to the plan

I plan ahead

I am structured and organized

Perceivers (P)

I am always looking for more information

I let life happen

I adapt easily

I go with the flow

I am relaxed and casual

Chapter 6: The Why Behind Lies

Deception : providing false information, omitting certain important details, exaggerating the truth, or distorting the truth

MBTI Types Most Likely to Deceive

ESFP

:like to keep the peace in relationships > omit certain information to avoid “unnecessary” arguments

:may exaggerate the truth to get attention, provide false information overlooking the consequences, or even cheat on their partners for thrills

ESTP

:may lie or omit certain details to spare someone’s feelings.

:care about their image >remove any piece of information that will make them look bad

:excellent manipulators as long as they can get what they want

:impulsive, reckless and only care about having fun, even if it is at the expense of others

ENTP

:not comfortable with sharing personal details about themselves

:have no problem lying to achieve their goals/get ahead in their career

ENFP

:value honesty > either forget to provide this information or there are certain things that they believe shouldn’t be shared

:can be manipulative, deceitful, and untrustworthy

:may pretend to like someone or befriend them to get something from them

ISTP

:can lie in the pursuit of their pleasure or to get ahead in their career

:likely to not respect the deadline but will make up for it by delivering great results

INTJ

:believe that you don’t share every little detail about yourself with others > set boundaries.

:more open to romantic partners

:may be narcissists & find the justification for it

The Dark Triad

:personality types capable of deceiving & manipulating includes narcissism, psychopathy, and machiavellianism.

Psychopathy

:manipulators with the lack of empathy

:do anything to achieve their goals, even if it is at the expense of others

:lie for the fun of it - want to see if they can get away with it

:lie to create a grander self-image to be admired

Narcissism

:selfish, arrogant, lack empathy, dominant, entitled

:have a grandiose self-image > often lie to keep up with this

Machiavellianism

:named after Niccolo Machiavelli, authored a book titled “The Prince,” which was about acquiring power by any means necessary

:manipulation, duplicity, & lack of empathy and morality

MBTI Types Most Likely to Be Deceived

INFJ

:usually skeptical but believe anything their loved ones say to the extent of questioning their own beliefs

:get drained easily - lie to be there for others at their own expense

ENFJ

:completely trust people they let into their lives

:genuine + sincere - don’t even omitting certain information

INFP

:refuse to believe that a person they choose to trust can be a liar or deceitful

:aren’t looking to fit in > too creative and free-spirited to do things the traditional way

ISTJ

:skeptical by nature but would never question someone they love or trust deeply

:don’t lie, not even to spare someone’s feelings

:so blunt that they get mistaken for being rude or mean

ESTJ

:honest but will never share their innermost feelings with anyone

:don’t know how to communicate what they are feeling

ISFJ

:trusting individuals,

:often get taken advantage of

ESFJ

:only lie to their loved ones to spare their feelings

:don’t believe in sharing everything with strangers

ISFP

:trust the people they let into their lives

:sensitive > smile and pretend to be ok

:don’t like awkward situations or making a scene > lie when your words hurt them

MBTI Types That Can’t Be Deceived

ENTJ

:care about their privacy > not entirely truthful with people outside their close circle

INTP

:very skeptical > analyze and do research to ensure any information is true

:all-or-nothing attitude > miscalculate things > may make false promises or sell people an idea before they have all the facts

Chapter 7: Identifying Deception in People

1)Watch Facial Expressions

2)Change in Complexity

go pale - a clue to deceit when blood drains from the face

3)Dryness or Sweating

perspire, squint or blink excessively, have dry mouth/eyes, over-swallow or lick their lips

4)Tone and Sentence Structure

muscles in vocal cords tighten because of stress resulting in a high-pitched voice or clearing the throat to release tension

5)Volume change

When we are defensive, we tend to speak louder.

6)How They Use Words

ex. “honestly,” “let me be honest with you,”

Filler words ex. “uh,” “like,” and “um” to buy time

7)Inadvertent Errors

going back and forth on their words

8)Examine Their Eyes and Mouth

Liars often purse their lips after being confronted with difficult questions

Avoiding eye contact or holding gaze = contemplating their response

Decreasing blink rate = mentally stimulated

9)Listen to How They Talk

talk about what they hear and what they see.

don’t add how things smelled, mention any spatial awareness, or talk about relationships or interactions with others

typically keep the conversation on a very shallow level

try to convey their message in a manner that they think the other person wants to hear

Levels of Deception

Average

:say anything that maintains their self-esteem or keeps the conversation moving

:lie out of habit and have inconsistencies

Slightly Above Average

:compulsive lying

:say questionable things

Above Average

:have personality disorder -imbalance in viewing reality such as borderline, narcissism, paranoia, histrionics, and obsessive-compulsive disorder

:driven by ego which they defend no matter what

:childish, abnormal behaviors ex. as blaming others or inventing improbable accidents >lead to resentment, annoyance, and suspicion if they are placed in authority

:self-denial and unstable sense of self > unable to exercise morality or contemplation

Advanced

:i.e.sociopaths and psychopaths

:physical brain differs from the brain of a person with a conscience (lie without conscience and forget it)

:lack of nurture (neglect) from childhood

:society’s rules and restrictions against lying have no meaning to them

:lie to satisfy their own needs < lack respect for the truth and for others

:interested in causing confusion, uncertainty, and anger (not within society’s norms of honesty)

Chapter 8: Truth Indicators in Lies

Statistics about Lies

21% in an effort to avoid others

20% for the purpose of jokes and pranks

14% for the sake of self-protection

13% to appear more impressive

11% to protecting others

9% for personal gain

5% to benefit another person

2% aimed at hurting another person

5% no reason / unspecified purposes

**88.6% = “little white lies”

The 9 Basic PBCAT Rating Scales

1. The elimination of sensory details

Liars often eliminate details regarding their thoughts and feelings - harder to make up and stay consistent with

2. They constantly claim that they have a weak memory.

False since you will likely remember the general flow of events if you’ve lived through it

3. They make unnecessary fixes.

Liars come up with numerous renditions of their stories, since they go back and forth so much.

4. They don’t bother to get into the details.

Developing a long-form detail that may be forgotten later is omitted.

5. They make contradictory and irrational statements.

6. They take the time to ponder deeply - sign of experiencing cognitive load

7. Tense, anxiety, and nervousness

8. Unusually positive

Trying too hard to come off as cool and unbothered in situations where others would normally make a few complaints

9. They are very slow talkers.

Take more time to formulate sentences to try being consistent, positive, and believable

Unearthing the Truth from a Lie

Speaker

-tell long story and conveys emotions and sensory details

-can maintain reasonable or adequate amounts of eye contact throughout the story

-not fidgety

-not breathing shakily

-generally steady tone of voice

-don’t try to blame others for their shortcomings

-not trying too hard to keep a positive impression

-not blinking at a faster or slower-than-usual rate

-not intentionally covering their throat for no apparent reason

-not playing around with their hair or accessories or touching their nose

-making complete and coherent sentences - don’t pose unnecessarily between words or phrases

Chapter 9: How to Read People like a Book

CANOE / OCEAN

5 main traits of personalities

conscientiousness, agreeableness, neuroticism, openness, and extroversion

Conscientiousness = tend to do their work in a responsible and thorough manner /better academic performers

Agreeable = great company / easy to get along with

Neurotic = mood swings / high anxiety levels

Openness = curious / adventurous/ creative thinkers

Extroversion = enjoy stimulation / like to try things out, esp. to reap great rewards

**There is no black and white in personalities.

**Many people lie in the middle of the spectrum of each of the traits.

How to Apply the Big Five Traits

Se/Extroverted Sensing

:thrive in a stimulating environment (offer a range of sensory input) ex. move around, attend meetings, talk to people, and tackle challenges

Si/Introverted Sensing

:like to work by the book, follow instructions, road maps, progress tracking, a to-do list, and constructive feedback

Ni/Introverted Intuiting

:need to take some time off from the pressures of the external world to self-reflect and activate their inner workings

:like to visualize and explore the nitty-gritty details of new ideas

Ne/Extroverted Intuiting

:like to be given a wide array of inputs when it comes to brainstorming - think best/inspired when exposed to numerous distractions

:easily swayed - like to explore the relationships between various ideas + enjoy mind games

Te/Extroverted Thinking

:very economical minds - focus on measurable things

:don’t engage in unimportant matters - only use facts/prefer grids, diagrams, maps, and charts

Ti/Introverted Thinking

:rely on inner and complex thought processes - don’t necessarily need to refer to any sensory inputs

:deduce information, categorize it, and create a little pro and con chart inside their brain

:perfectionists - aim for accuracy

:social and emotional inputs can be very stressful

Fe/Extroverted Feeling

:attentive to what you say and what you’re thinking of them but never reveal it through physical appearance or reactions

:hold their ethics and personal beliefs in the highest regard

:if you’re upset with them, make sure to communicate this through your words and not tone

Fi/Introverted Feeling

:listen more to a person’s tone of voice than to their choice of words - care more about the motive behind the words you speak and pay attention to things you may have left unsaid